premiership prediction 2006-07

1. chelsea

yip, i'm gonna be predictable and say that chelsea will win the league again... although i think it will be closer than last year. think mourinho has got problems this year - he doesn't know what his best team or formation is... and when / if he decides this, he will have some super huge ego's kicking their heals on the sidelines. looks as if he's gonna go 4-4-2 with schevchenko and drogba up front. that means two out of lampard, ballack, makahele, essien, robben and cole on the bench... and they're not gonna be happy with that. also, by signing ballack, mourinho has recreated the lampard / gerrard england problem in midfield - only at chelsea, neither of them can play out wide. at the back they are looking thin... if terry gets injured, i think they could def ship a few goals. all is not well at chelsea, and this could def be their last year of dominance.

2. liverpool

liverpool have made some good signings over the summer and appear to have remedied the lack of pace in the team with the acquisition of bellamy and pennant. they have also added gonzalez and aurelio on the left and kuijt up front (not totally convinced about him - a slow mark hughes - but he can't be any worse than cisse). they have an awesome midfield trio in alonso, sissoko and gerrard (the most influential player in the league by a mile). they also appear to be well covered at the back despite the continued prescence of carragher, who is average at best. can def see them having a good season.

3. man yoo

i'm tipping them for 3rd... just. this is assuming they bring in another midfield player (looks to be either hargreaves or senna). they are decent at the back with van der sar and rio. carrick is an awesome signing for them in midfiled, but i don't think ferguson realises he is a deep lying playmaker sitting in front of the back four rather than a more advanced player. i love giggs and ronaldo - they are two of my favourite players ever. up front, united are battling with rooney the only player with any class - the rest blatantly average (including saha). ferguson hasn't got a clue anymore and is def over the hill. he hasn't identified a good player that he can buy for under £10m in five years - he just cherry picks from other clubs at super high prices. man usa are going to regret keeping him on.

4. tottenham hotspur

spurs are 4th... pushing for 3rd if utd fail to sign a midfielder before the end of august. ekotto, zakora, and berbatov are awesome signings and if we had signed duff we probably would have cleaned up - league, fa cup, league cup and uefa cup. as it is, i'm tipping us for a triple - the three cup competitions we've entered and a respectable 4th in the league. with carrick gone, we'll play a different game this season, more direct, relying on the pace of lennon, jenas, and ekotto to catch to opposition out of position - this should result in us picking up more points away from home. the team have an awesome spine - robinson, king, dawson, zakora, jenas, berbatov, and keane / defoe - that is still young and can only get better. this is gonna be our season.

5. arsen*l

the arse are rubbish. they have lost bergkamp, pires and c*ntball. reyes and cole are on their way and there is dissent in the ranks. lehman has sore feet, the defence is thread bare, and the midfield is lightweight (although fabregas is quite good), and henry is on the wane (he won't be interested except in the champions league). arsenal are only heading one way... and that is down into massive debt. they'll probably be relegated in 5 years.

6. everton

with johnson and beattie up front... cahill, arteta, super simon davies and the hard-working-but-average neville in the midfield... and yobo and lescott at the back, i think they could have a pretty good season. why did they sign howard though? under moyes they have always been organised and with the touch of class added i expect them to finish 6th... although it will be about 8 - 10 points off 5th place.

7. portsmouth

portsmouth have a decent spine in james, c*ntball, mendes, davis, taylor, o'neill... they just need someone up front... but i'm backing harry to organise something (he always does). with money to burn, expect a few more signings before august and in jan.

8. west ham

i hate the spammers... but i reckon they'll do okay. they play free-flowing, open football and with the quality they have in midfield and up front they will give a lot of teams a good. my tip to lose to spurs in one of the fa cup semi-finals.

9. newcastle

duff... you knob... if you had come to spurs we would have won the championship. instead you're going to be wallowing in mid-table. roeder is a shocking manager (almost as bad as souness) and they are light at the back and up front with owen out for life. they have a good midfield though and parker, emre and duff should see them into the top half.

10. blackburn

with bellamy gone blackburn have lost their most potent weapon and a whole lot of pace. i'd like to see mccarthy do well and hope he can score some goals (manu will prob pick him up next season for £23m if he gets 15 - cos god knows saha won't even hit 6). the are a good, solid, no frills side that is going to finish 10th.

11. villa

they have a top 4 manager, but a bottom 4 squad. that can only spell mid-table. i like o'neill... he speaks a whole lot of sense. barry is prob the only decent player in the squad... cos baros runs around like a very fast headless chicken... but if o'neill can spend some of the yank's money they may make the top half. manu def missed the boat by not getting rid of ferguson and getting o'neill.

12. man city

made some decent, if old signings. hamman, dabo and corradi should be decent players. barton is good in midfield and they have one of the best youngsters in british football in micah richards (manu will prob buy him for £34m in two years time). i also like pearce... he has passion. still only reckon they'll finish mid-table though.

13. charlton

hasselbaink and bent look like they could score goals... but in traore they have signed the worst ever champions league winner (who in their right mind would spend £2m on him?). andy 'who ate all the pies' reid will do well for them on the left and ambrose is promising on the right. but they still have traore in their squad and that has to be worth a 6 point deficit at the start.

14. bolton

bolton have lost too many players and haven't replaced them. okocha, nakata, jaidi, n'gotty, etc. they look vulnerable at the back. nolan and giannakopolous are strong in midfield, but campo is just a joke. up front they look slow and predictable... so i'm gonna go for a big fall this year - 14th.

15. boro

can't stand boro... they are rubbish... and downing is slow... and southgate has buck-teeth... and yakubu has malaria... and they wanted to sign robert huth... the fact that they didn't sign him means they'll escape relegation.

16. wigan

they signed heskey... enough said... they are lucky i don't put them at position number 20.

17. sheff utd

one promoted team has to escape relegation and i'm going for sheff utd. tonge and jagielka are decent players and they are a physically strong, organised team.

18. fulham

it is a pity... but my local club are going down. this is because a girl i know has messed with their best player's head and he no longer wants to play football. it sure is a sad, sad situation.

19. reading

reading... in the premiership... are you having a laugh.

20. watford

dave fisher (www.wozafriday.com) lives there... it is a sh*t-hole. no decent player worth two bob would want to live there... hence their rubbish team.